Flash Focus: Be “First In Line” for Mary Beth Caschetta

First in Line
Mary Beth Caschetta

Ms. LeChance is five years old.

On good days, she waits at the bus stop by herself. Her mother watches a few feet away in a station wagon that is puffing out exhaust. On bad days, Ms. LeChance lies around in her bathrobe; her mother drinks orange juice with vodka, watches Monty Hall, and pats her arm. "We're in no mood for kindergarten today!"

Refusing to let life get her down, Ms. LeChance lives by memento mori. She mimes asphyxiation because her twin brother Gerald (deceased) couldn't get enough air to keep his skin pink and healthy. This was during childbirth. In truth, as babies, they'd both arrived a few months earlier than expected, which caused some complications for little Gerry, whose lungs were not entirely formed.

"Anyway," says Ms. LeChance, "I'm the lucky one, coming out first and getting the air."

"Bon chance," her mother sometimes says. It's French.

At home, they also speak a little Latin. Her father says, "carpe diem," a philosophy she adores.

At the supermarket, her mother gloats. "My little Mary really wows 'em during Show and Tell!" But in truth five-year-olds are cruel, and Ms. LeChance is insecure. The smell of her need, raw and unfiltered, makes her classmates antsy. No one likes to see a child unmothered.

Driving home with a car full of groceries, her mother makes confessions. "I think the veggie man is awfully sexy." (On bad days, barely a word.)

With their bright puffy jackets and their boxes of organized lunch, the children from the neighborhood seem to know what's what; their mothers tell them everything: Poor little Mary and her dead brother Gerry.

Either way, she lives in the now. "I never let anyone use by Christian name," she tells Mimi Schwartz, who is always second in line. "My name is terrible luck and rhymes with the dead."

Mimi Schwartz shrugs her off. "I wouldn't know. I'm Jewish."

A blond kid with dirty jeans and a black eye give Ms. LeChance a shove. He is notorious for having five older brothers and a snail collection. Mimi Schwartz offers him a winning smile.

Ms. LeChance will cut her losses. "You can call me 'Ms.' for short, if you'd like.

But no one calls her anything.

Today, she doesn't turn and wave when the school bus comes to take her away.

Originally appeared in Quick Fiction; appears here with author's permission.

The piece, "First in Line" by Mary Beth Caschetta, beautifully captures the world through the eyes of a young troubled girl. The author seamlessly uses the voice of five year old Ms. LeChance while combining it with the more insightful words of an older narrator. Artfully using sensory detail, well-crafted characters, insightful interior landscape, telling dialogue, emotion filled images, and realistic action the author has readers caring about the outcome from start to finish.

From the first two lines, "Ms. LeChance is five years old. On good days, she waits at the bus stop by herself." Readers are already wondering about her name and concerned for this child who thinks waiting alone for the bus to school is a "good day." We can see the disengaged and dysfunctional mother in the "station wagon that is puffing out exhaust." The author's description of the station wagon and the exhaust give readers an immediate impression of this woman and this family and that impression is only strengthened throughout the rest of the piece.

Caschetta takes the relatively common occurrence of an alcoholic mother and nearly absent father and puts a new spin on the idea by telling it from the point of view of a five year old who won't even use her name because she thinks it is "terrible luck and rhymes with the dead." The narrator lets us know that Ms. LeChance's brother died of asphyxiation because his lungs were not fully formed at birth. Ms. LeChance knows this and describes herself as "the lucky one, coming out first and getting the air." The voice of this young girl is clear in her dialogue. But as readers, Ms. LeChance's life does not look lucky though she "lives by memento mori" and "refuses to let life get her down."

I believe the theme of this story might best be seen in these beautiful lines "But in truth five-year-olds are cruel, and Ms. LeChance is insecure. The smell of her need, raw and unfiltered, makes her classmates antsy. No one likes to see a child unmothered." From the intricate details of the boy with "five older brothers and a snail collection" to the powerful ideas of a child having to grow up before her time, a dysfunctional family, and the death of an infant, this is a piece that will stay with readers long after it is over.

About the Author

Jessica Collins is an MFA in Creative Writing (Fiction) candidate at Rosemont College. She graduated
from Drexel University with a degree in political science and
Rowan University with a masters in writing arts. She works as a real estate
and tax lien investor and currently lives in Medford, New Jersey with her
Labrador Bucklee.

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